This semester has been hard for me in a different way than I'm used to. Rather than struggling with something specific such as a relationship, schoolwork, or the job hunt, I seemed to have it all together on those fronts. I've lined up an incredible job for next year, I've moved into a new apartment with roommates I actually enjoy spending time with, and I'm only taking 10 hours of classes. However it's been one of the most disorganized semesters I've ever had and it's for a reason I can't really control-- my depression.
It's hard to believe that even in a semester where I felt like I've got everything together, I can have days, even weeks, of a downward spiral of depression. After several days of spending all day in bed, canceling plans and not eating, my roommates voiced their concern for me. I made an appointment to see my therapist, who decided that my antidepressants weren't doing their job and decided to 'up' my dosage. I left the office hoping that I would do better after that and that my tendency to let a little bad news affect my entire day would be tempered.
However, a few weeks later, I had some bad days that caused me to miss class and sleep for almost 16 hours straight. Now, I realized that I couldn't rely on medication alone to get me through this and I certainly couldn't let it affect my professional/academic life anymore. Understanding that even though my personal life is separate from my professional life in so many other ways, this aspect is blurring the line. I have to reevaluate my coping mechanisms in order to cater to my professional/academic reputation, which can be severely affected by my days in bed.
In order to work though my depression, I've created an active lifestyle for myself which, although doesn't completely solve the problem, definitely helps my mood. I work out nearly every day and have begun eating fruits and vegetables on a daily basis, as well as cooking most of my meals. Not only is my body feeling healthier, but I feel more fulfilled knowing I'm taking care of myself.
Although I still have days when it's hard to get out of bed, they're fewer and farther in between. And while I would probably have just let my body work through this on its own otherwise, my professional life and that reputation have caused me to look for any and all solutions. That's what I've seen as a meaningful connection between personal and professional and it's taught me to take control of things that I may not have complete control over, because the more effort I put into it, the better the outcome that I will see.
It's hard to believe that even in a semester where I felt like I've got everything together, I can have days, even weeks, of a downward spiral of depression. After several days of spending all day in bed, canceling plans and not eating, my roommates voiced their concern for me. I made an appointment to see my therapist, who decided that my antidepressants weren't doing their job and decided to 'up' my dosage. I left the office hoping that I would do better after that and that my tendency to let a little bad news affect my entire day would be tempered.
However, a few weeks later, I had some bad days that caused me to miss class and sleep for almost 16 hours straight. Now, I realized that I couldn't rely on medication alone to get me through this and I certainly couldn't let it affect my professional/academic life anymore. Understanding that even though my personal life is separate from my professional life in so many other ways, this aspect is blurring the line. I have to reevaluate my coping mechanisms in order to cater to my professional/academic reputation, which can be severely affected by my days in bed.
In order to work though my depression, I've created an active lifestyle for myself which, although doesn't completely solve the problem, definitely helps my mood. I work out nearly every day and have begun eating fruits and vegetables on a daily basis, as well as cooking most of my meals. Not only is my body feeling healthier, but I feel more fulfilled knowing I'm taking care of myself.
Although I still have days when it's hard to get out of bed, they're fewer and farther in between. And while I would probably have just let my body work through this on its own otherwise, my professional life and that reputation have caused me to look for any and all solutions. That's what I've seen as a meaningful connection between personal and professional and it's taught me to take control of things that I may not have complete control over, because the more effort I put into it, the better the outcome that I will see.
